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Thursday, February 14, 2008

new year's resolutions

Perhaps an odd time to be making new year's resolutions, but we celebrated the Chinese New Year only last week, so I don't feel too guilty about grabbing a second chance. (I might post a little something about the celebrations sometime...). This is the year of the rat.

1. Stop being so anally retentive about writing the perfect post for the blog every week. Let's face it, nothing's perfect and in the end nothing gets published because nothing is good enough. You only end up disappointing your three or so loyal readers. So just write, one sentence, one word, anything. It's not an examination, it's life.

2. Stop being so whiny. People are too self-absorbed to notice that you crave attention.

3. Stop being so suspicious. Not everyone being nice to you has ulterior motives. Some people are just nice. I know it's hard to believe, but there it is.

4. Find a new job. The fact that the boss gave everyone except you a substantial Christmas gift (in cash) definitely has some subliminal message.

5. Get married. Gather some guts and look the magistrate in the eye when telling him you are marrying a man, is there a problem with that?

6. Stop drinking. During the week.

7. Start using your R275 a month gym membership. That paunch has you looking like Jimmy Abbott more and more every day. Alternatively, cancel the membership and buy R275 worth of dieting pills every month.

8. Stop undressing in front of the bedroom window in the afternoon when getting home from work. Yes, those people in the apartment opposite you are the perverts, but stop giving them the chance.

9. Stop playing so much Sims. The rule used to be no Sims during the week… so what happened? Those circles under the bags under the rings under your eyes are not very fetching.

10. Be more positive. What you say is what you get, after all.
Let’s see how far we can go with these.

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