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Wednesday, September 30, 2009

the inseperable

The One and I will celebrate our 4rth anniversary this year on the 11th of October. Four years we have been living together now and four years we have moulded one another into completely different persons than we were when we first met. We have learned that not one of us is perfect and that everybody has secrets. Probably the biggest secret that got revealed by The One to I was that his head does not always work properly due to his schizo-affective disorder. The One has discovered in I a dark temper and a certain amount of selfishness. But I guess we all are selfish. Above all there is love and lots of it. Both of us have thought about ourselves as loners – not needing anybody but we have been proven wrong. We are in each others’ thoughts the whole day and, what a joy when I comes home from work to his beloved. We now know that our love will last forever but I cannot help but to think about the one thing that will separate us one day which is death. Who will die first? The One hopes that he dies first and I hopes that he will die first to dodge the pain associated with the death of a mate. We are convinced that when the one dies, the other one will not live long after that. We tell ourselves that we will meet again after death but, then again, we are not really religious and we do not really hold a belief as to what happens after death. The One wants to perform an experiment as he is convinced that he will die first as depressive people don’t grow very old. When The One dies he will try to contact I from the realm of death and if I doesn’t hear from The One then we all will know that there is nothing after death. I does not like the idea of this experiment at all and asked The One not to go through with it once he dies. I is more scared of death than The One. About one and a half years ago The One had a close call with death with a failed suicide attempt. I was devastated. The One had many regrets while recovering in hospital about being rescued successfully from the overdose of pills but today he is glad to be alive because every morning when he wakes up I is next to him which is a reason to stay alive. That’s what people do, we stay alive for each other and love is the only thing in life that is immortal.

Written by The One